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Introductory Calculus for Infants

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Most high schools have multiple math tracks: arithmetic, geometry, and algebra comprise the extent of some kids’ entire mathematical learning. Others go on to trigonometry, pre-calc, and finally, calculus itself – the New Math.

Bluntly, your infant is probably not going to understand calculus, but that’s not quite the point: the point is to keep your kid from fearing calculus in about 13 years. Think about it: once you get past the “Johnny has three apples” phase of mathematics instruction, it gets a little wibbly-wobbly (not to mention timey-wimey). Abstract conceptualization is a high-order brain function and rightly revered as the significant differentiator between people and animals. The idea that Johnny could have apples approaching, but never reaching, infinity is enough to blow the minds of most high-school students because they’ve been taught that these concepts are weird, foreign, alien, and hard-to-grasp.

Nonsense – difficult math problems are just like boogey men: once you shine a bright light on them, they lose their intimidating and fearsome aura. If your kid were afraid of the dark, you’d buy a nightlight, and if you don’t want your kid to be afraid of Leibniz notation, you’d buy Introductory Calculus for Infants by Omi M. Inouye.

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