Yeah, I’m a dad. Have been for the past six years. And all the rumors are true: It’s been simultaneously the most rewarding and most harrowing adventure of my life. Do I deserve special recognition for this? Probably not. None of us do, really. It’s our responsibility to be good parents. Otherwise, we should never have gotten involved. And I’m no fan of mandated good will, but here we are, on the cusp of another Father’s Day. And your partner and/or children are going to get something for you, so it should be something cool, right?
Here are a few items that would fit the bill, for the nerdiest of fathers on this auspicious occasion.
1. Chutes Away
OK, I bought this for myself many years ago, but Chutes Away is one of those retro games that brings back a flood of memories. Finding a good one, one whose base still rotates, is a little challenging, but they are out there. And this is the kind of thing a dad can share with his kid, and both can enjoy the hell out of.
2. Star Trek Bathrobe
Forget the freakin’ tie already. These Star Trek bathrobes are so awesome. Even for non-Trekkies. In blue, red or yellow, these robes will have dad believing he actually runs the household Enterprise. We all know he doesn’t, but what the hell. At least he’s easier to get along with when he thinks he’s in charge. You might have to rein him in a bit, however, when he starts … talking in halted … dramatic … phrases … like William Shatner in a bathrobe.
3. 8-Bit Ties
All right, for you traditionalists, here are amazing retro 8-bit ties. Dad will wow ‘em at the office – co-workers older than 40, that is. The rest of the crew (unless they are total hipsters) will look at him as if he were, you know, old and daddish. But who cares? Your Pops knows how completely awesome these ties are. And if he’s the super-cool dad you always thought he was, he has shown you how to play Asteroids, Space Invaders and even, yes, PONG.
4. Zombie Coffee Mug
Is dad a zombie till he has his morning coffee? Give him a subtle hint with this gory mug. Of course, if he’s a Walking Dead fan, all the better. Even if he isn’t imbibing gallons of Joe every morning, he’ll enjoy tipping this nifty mug and thinking of you, his favorite little zombie.
5. Darth Vader “I am your father” T-shirt
Yeah, this is badass. Full on Vader style for dad. Just be aware that if you purchase this Darth Vader T-shirt for your old man, and you do something stupid – say wreck the family car – he will seem a hundred times more menacing while disciplining you if he’s wearing this shirt. Well, he is your father — and he may just chop your hand off to keep you from wrecking any more cars.
6. Geeky Family Cosplay Shirts and Onesies
Just because dad’s officially a grown up, it doesn’t mean he has to act like one. These cosplay tees for kids and adults and onesies for babies come in designs inspired by Star Wars, Legend of Zelda, and a whole mess of 80’s cartoon characters. It’s important to teach kids about the classics, but it’s even more important to let loose and have a little fun.