Dice, the ultimate random number generator. They hold the power to determine one’s fate in a life-or-death situation. They’ve destroyed armies, aided in the creation of heroes, determined the outcome of wars and let you narrowly avoid the outlandish rent on Park Place because your friend’s an asshole who built a hotel there. Yes, these geometric wonders help shape the classic gaming experience.
Many of us started out throwing the standard six-sided die. What I like to call “rolling the cube.” But the first time we felt like a real gamer was when we held a D20. Twenty sides, twenty different outcomes. How could a mere mortal design such a magnificent polyhedral? Now you can bestow the magnificent icosahedron upon your offspring. Think of it as paying homage to the gods of chance. May your natural criticals be plenty.
1. D20 Bib “All Natural, Baby!”
Damn right your little dragonslayer is all natural. Babies ignore any ability modifiers, including penalties. This super-cute bib can be purchased at Gamer Mom Creations via Etsy. Pro-Tip: Number all the different types of baby food in your pantry and roll a dice to see what you’ll be serving to the little prince or princess.
2. D20 Necklace
What if you have an older kid who is just learning how to play their first pen and paper RPG? You buy them the D20 purple-and-gray necklace, of course. Not only will their friends be jealous, but you can begin to teach them that life is full of possibilities. Like which disease they’re likely to contract after the age of 50. You can pick up this necklace from the Nerdcred’s Etsy store.
3. D20 Gamer Dice Bag
You’ve bought your apprentice dungeon master their first unique set of solid plastic polyhedrons. Now they need to store them some place safe. It’s a bag with a zipper designed like a twenty-sided dice that holds all your die. Genius! You can choose different colors, so your whole family can own one. Order them from Froggy Creations through their store on Etsy. Bonus: If a bag isn’t your style, check out this zipper pouch.
4. The D20 Pillow
All that rolling and monster slaying will leave your level one adventurer quite exhausted. Don’t worry folks, they put a 20-sided dice on everything these days. Rest your head and dream of completing that next quest with this polyester throw pillow. Pick one up over at Society 6.
5. A Set of Giant Foam Dice
Are you worried about the little ones choking during their first campaign? No sweat. Thinkgeek sells foam dice that are about the size of your fist. The set comes with 4-, 8-, 10-, 12- and 20-sided dice. Not sure why they left out the 6-sided one. I guess he got too loaded. Oh god, what a horrible pun. You can pick up a set from Thinkgeek.
6. Little Fat Dice Dragon
Some people will tell you that rolling the dice is all about chance and that luck doesn’t play a part. Don’t say that to Han Solo. Personally, I think we can all use a little advantage when it comes to deciding our character’s fate. Introducing the little fat dice dragon, a super-cute purple reptile with spikes on his head. His mission is to protect your D20, and charge it with good karma vibes. What, you’ve never heard of a luck dragon? Pick up this little fat dragon Buddha from Etsy.
7. That’s How I Roll D20 T-Shirt
Face the facts: Once your children play their first RPG, they’re going to be hooked. This D20 t-shirt says it all. My character is chaotic neutral. He’s like Jack Sparrow, deal with it. “That’s how I roll, peoples.” Point made, now go buy this shirt for your kids.
8. Level 20 Gamer Merit Badge
Say what you will about the Boy and Girl Scouts, but kids dig achievement badges. Now you can hook up your novice role-player with this sweet D20 gamer badge. Once your child has created a character, why not offer this sweet badge of honor? It’s a big step into a world of endless possibilities and mind-blowing fun. Compare it to their first steps. Grab the badge at this Etsy store.
9. R2D2 – D20 Wall Print
We’ve covered just about everything D20 related, but what about artwork? What’s better than a painting of a dice? R2D2 projecting a D20, while floating in the middle of space. I’m not sure what it means exactly. Maybe your family loves the Star Wars RPG game. Who knows? It’s still awesome. Click over to Society 6 to snag a print.
10. D20 Flower Hair Clip
This one is for the young female gamers out there. If your child feels like rolling is just for boys, then you should order this D20 hair clip. This is 2013 and we’re in the golden age of board games and RPGs. There’s no time for stereotypes. Let the haters hate and the gamers roll. Maegan sells this hair clip from her store on Etsy.